Here are some things you need to know about me:
- I am married to a white man
- We have a biracial child together
- I don't owe you a goddamn explanation for either
I say this because I often get "why would you date a white guy" and no. No. No, sir. I don't owe you shit.
When I was 12 years old, I told myself I would marry someone who loves Buffy The Vampire Slayer as much as I do. After dating a short while, I found out this dude was literally in the Buffy fan club. Wedding bells rang almost immediately.
Saying that to say, interracial couples are always under scrutiny. It doesn't matter how alike you are or that your SO, who happens to be white, was the only one holding your hand in the hospital, your relationship only exists because somewhere deep down you hate black men so much.
It's exhausting to hear that shit.
So looking at the McClures, it was refreshing. They had such real conversations, such love for each other and their children that you couldn't help but be inspired by it.
So hearing that Daddy McClure said some racist shit in the past was disappointing. It hurt because I looked up to this couple. I enjoyed watching them interact with their children in a healthy manner
But watching his apology affirmed my faith in humanity. Watch the full video here
I am a strict believer in apology form. There will be no fauxpologies on my watch. This is what I did NOT hear in Justin's apology
- "I'm sorry if..."
- "I'm sorry but..."
- "I have three black children so..."
Those statements would have been red flags for me, but the structure of his apology felt sincere because:
- He owned up to those statements
- He recognized the impact of those statements
- He apologized to his wife for hurting and embarrassing her
- He talked to his children as another way of showing accountability
- He recognized that this apology may not be enough for some people, without mocking or belittling them.
I think if you still refuse to support these YouTubers after this, that's fair. This post isn't to sway your opinion. This post is to make you aware of apologies when they are sincere. In my honest opinion, nothing about Justin's apology screamed "A PR PERSON WROTE THIS" to me. Instead, after watching him be vulnerable on camera so many times, it not only felt sincere, it felt authentic to who he was.
I usually watch The McClure Twins in order to understand parenting more. But this apology video actually taught me that marriages aren't perfect, and interracial marriages have their own set of daily battles. But with the right two people, they can win those battles each day.
You know who can't apologize for shit? Roseanne.
Tell me your thoughts on Justin McClure and what you feel is a sincere apology. Drop a comment below.
KantCon is a tabletop convention located in Overland Park, KS. Every year, gaming enthusiasts get together to do what they love most: game.
From my Instagram Takeover on Saturday, you could tell there were plenty of geeky vendors in the gaming halls. There was no shortage of dice holders, merch with gaming references, and D20 dice. In fact, one of those dice was a big old stuffed version that I plan to buy for me- I mean, Bby-8.
But attending a gaming convention can make you question yourself. Am I enough of a gamer to be here? What kind of knowledge do I need to have to go in?
The answer: None. Seriously, come as you are. What are your other excuses?
"I have kids and don't have a babysitter"
Bring them with you. Seriously. KantCon is a very family oriented convention. There is even a Kids KantCon gaming area, where there are board games, soft lightsabers, and even a Make Your Own Mask station. I saw older children playing in the main hall with the best of them.
"Seriously, I don't know much about games"
The thing I loved about KantCon is that you could have walked in their accidentally, said "cool, I'd like to attend, but I've never played a tabletop game before" and someone would be willing to show you how to play.
There was no gatekeeping here. Everyone here was so polite and willing to teach anyone about the world of tabletop gaming.
There was a very nice gentleman that told me everything I needed to know about Artemis. There was a small area set up with about 4 laptops and a projection screen. While also helping those in the middle of their gameplay, he even came up to me and explained how the game worked. The best being is that it would work on almost any computer system. No gaming upgrade needed. I need to review this game at a later date because he had me convinced!
"I don't live in Kansas, silly"
Ok, that's a fair excuse. However, if you don't have plans to visit that neck of the woods. I encourage you to look to see if there are any tabletop gaming conventions in your area.
Overall, I think most cons try to be inclusive, but KantCon really means it. Not once did I run into anyone who was like "You don't know what that is?" *scoff*. Children and adults alike were on the game floor, having an amazing time. Above all, everyone was super respectful and kind to everyone.
My only complaint? That I didn't purchase this.
What do you guys think? Is this something that would make you want to go to KantCon? Holler at me in the comments section.
As part of our Geeky Girls Guide to WakandaCon series, wouldn't you want to learn about the women behind the con? Cause let's face it. Con after con after con after con, female leadership can be, well, almost non-existent. But that's not the case with WakandaCon.
WakandaCon, taking place August 3rd through the 5th in windy Chicago, is headed by women who are almost as fierce as the Dora Milaje. But even more than that, they are inspiring. Don't think you can reach your dreams? Think you can't win in a game that's stacked against Black women? The road is hard and not without scars, but these three women have proved that you can battle your way to the top.
Wayment, ALL Y'ALL WORK IN THE ARTS??
Yes! Just before I was about to take that Theater Degree and toss it in a fire, I learned that Ali Barthwell (Co-founder, Social Outreach), Lisa Beasley (Producer and Media Relations), and Taylor Witten (Producer and Content Strategist) all graduated from college with arts degrees. Ali attended Wellesley College, Lisa attended LeMoyne-Owen College and Taylor went to Dartmouth College. All three women combined have experience in acting, production, writing, directing, and teaching well after college.
This is inspiring because, as an arts major myself, it's just so validating to see women, black women in particular, out here doing the damn thing
The Path To WakandaCon is Paved With Friendship
Each of them came to WakandaCon in their own way "Wakandacon is founded on principles that I feel are personally important to move our people and culture forward." Taylor says about the convention, "Blackness is a spectrum. Out with the old, and limited question of “are you Black enough?” We aim to shift what it means to be Black, culturally, personally, professionally, and expressively. No matter where you land on the spectrum - your journey and experience shape the culture. We want this to be a movement. We want to create more seats at the table, establish safe spaces for creatives of color, and amplify their voices. By joining the Wakandacon team, I felt like I had found my tribe."
Lisa didn't take much convincing to hop on the project, "My friend Ali Barthwell reached out to me and told me that her brother had an idea named “Wakandacon.” I really didn’t need any further explanation. I knew exactly what it was and exactly why she was telling me he had the idea. Honestly, it didn’t take much. I was on board when she said, “Hey, my brother has an idea.” I love helping my friends work out their ideas."
"My brothers and I were going to see Black Panther a lot and my older brother David came up with the name first: Wakandacon." Ali says, while I wonder if she beat me in the number of times she saw Black Panther. "He tried to pass it off to Matt and me to organize but we convinced David to lead us. As we started to build this idea, we realized that we needed more help so I recruited Taylor and Lisa who are friends of mine with experience in the areas we were missing. We’ve been creating and building this thing since that moment. There has been a lot of educating ourselves and learning from other cons and their successes and mistakes."
So...WYD Outside of WakandaCon?
Thing is, each of these women are out here living life, breaking glass ceilings, hell, breaking glass universes. Doors are opening for them all over the place.
Taylor thought she was slipping me a shameless plug, but I was gonna put her on blast anyway 🙂 She's got a film project in the works, called The One I Love. It's about a Christian couple who face trials and tribulations as they grow in their relationship and faith. Since Taylor is herself a woman of faith, her production of this Indie film comes straight from the heart.
Lisa is, to put it simply, changing the world. She is the co-founder of The Nova Collective which is a company that works to transform corporate culture. I wanted to know if there had possibly been an uptick in a need for this after...how do I put this lightly?...the shitstorm after the election. "The entire Diversity & Inclusion industry has increased due to the friction caused by the last election. Conversations are happening in the workplace whether people want them to or not and we help companies strategize how to have those conversations. The last election has put a magnifying glass on problems that have already existed in the workforce so I think a lot of the workforce is relieved people are finally talking about it."
I asked each of them "What's the best thing about being a black woman? what's the worst thing?"
Ali hits me with a simple but truthful statement, "The most challenging thing about being a Black woman is being a Black woman today and the best thing about being a Black woman is being a Black woman."
"Sometimes I can’t tell if people are not listening to me because what I’m saying is actually trash or because they are not used to listening to black women."Lisa tells me "I’ve often worked in environments where what I say is dismissed because of my identity but I’ve learned that that is also my superpower. Now I work in groups that value my expertise and experiences. The best thing about being a black woman. Oh geez. I love how I can bend and manipulate my hair in many different ways. I love the skin I’m in. I love being a black woman."
And lastly, Taylor is quite literally taking me to church with her answer. "The BEST part about being a Black woman," she says, "is that there is no limit to the type of woman I can be. Black women grace almost every part of the earth. We’re literally everywhere, doing all kinds of great things. It’s truly inspiring. The challenge is that most people don’t see us that way. I often come across people who have such a narrow view of who I should be and how I should act because I am a Black woman. My hope is that Wakandacon exposes us all to a new way of thinking about Black women and provides a better representation of our whole selves."
Lisa Stole My Dream Job, Y'all
Not really, no. She didn't steal it from me. But I was super jelly to learn that Lisa Beasley is a friggin' writer for Cards Against Humanity!!
"Super cool, right?" She says to my green-with-envy self "I’ve had the pleasure of working with a lot of the comedians and writers in the room. The head writers thought that I would be a good fit for the room. Because of my other projects taking off, I now work with them as a Remote Contributor."
If You Don't Read Any Other Part Of The Article, Read This
All three of these women have been out there making it happen for themselves. So I had to ask them one burning question:
How did you get to where you are today? How can someone like me succeed in this world? How? How? How!
Thing is, not only is Lisa working in the Arts, she is also making changes in Corporate America and has a lot of advice to give. "Big changes start with yourself. In attempting to save myself economically, I’ve been able to open doors for other people. The experiences that I’ve had as a black woman in certain industries led me to explore different career paths that could build spaces for people to do the work that they love to do. Selfishly, I wanted a place to work and found that a lot of my friends were having a hard time finding work because most jobs are just trying to fill a diversity quota and would only allow one of us at a time. So instead of waiting for someone to hire me, I created jobs for myself. If you’re a black woman and you want to make big changes, think about the why and hold that in your mind often. Knowing why you are doing what you are doing will get you through the tough times. Also, take care of yourself. We are so used to taking care of others that taking care of ourselves seems selfish."
Moving right along to Ali, who gives us the best advice on how to succeed as a black woman. "First, go to therapy" Ali scolds like a Saturday Morning Mama that tells you to get ready to clean all day "or find a restorative hobby." she continues.
"There will be difficult and trying experiences. You won’t be able to avoid them completely but remembering that your mental health and security is the most important thing. It’s very easy to think that our struggle fuels our creativity or as Black women, we should shoulder the burden and power through but you can’t create from an unhealthy place. You need moments to restore you that make you healthier.
I would also say that you are most likely two to three times better than your white counterparts. That’s just a fact. And if you’re anything like me, you probably work to be perfect before you even try anything because if you fail, there might not be a second chance. That desire to be exceptional only will help you. Don’t let that desire to be perfect hold you back from trying something new or become harmful. See why you’ll need therapy?
Lastly, rely on your networks. There are more people who are willing to give you advice, guidance, or an introduction than you realize. Asking someone for advice or asking them to tell you their story to success will make them feel important and they’ll probably want to help you. "
And lastly, Taylor leaves us with lasting advice that will get you through the entire week. Heck, maybe even the year. "I was really hoping to share some deeply impactful-life-changing Def Poetry Slam style advice," She says, "however, this is all that came to mind --- Decide. Commit. Succeed. Only you can determine your future and it starts with making a choice."
If these three women can make it, you can too. WakandaCon forever!
I know we have worn out Avengers: Infinity War to dea- uh, I mean.... #TooSoon
What I mean to say is, what drew me to this Etsy Shop was the sight of this beautiful Avengers: Infinity War wire wrapped ring. It's just to die fo- crap! Uh, I mean T'CHALLA IS FINE OK!!!
Upon looking through this shop, I needed to get to know the artist behind all of this. Dot is the shop owner of Healing Evergreen on Etsy. Residing on the East Coast, Dot's favorite comic book character is the Hulk (she'll talk more about him later). She shows a lot of her talents through wire art and her shop has evolved into painting, designs, and healing crystals. I love her personality as it is all over her site. Under a discussion about plant life she says, "I also talk to my plants to help them grow (don't knock it till you tried it)."
I mean, all of my plants are dead and not spoken to so....she may be on to something.
So my nerdiness lead me to wire art, healing crystals, and these mix and match jewelry loc sets (which, can I get these in an Avengers Infinity Stone set for my locs, please???). I had to interview this gal and see what she was all about.
So, here's my interview with Dot. Enjoy our tomfoolery 🙂
Quinzel: What got you started in Wire Art?
Dot: "I saw some earrings I could not afford and decided I could make those. A couple of girls at work liked what I made and it started from there! And now I am going more towards using wire in painting and designing and moving away from jewelry."
Q: I know you said you are moving away from jewelry, but the Avengers ring is gorgeous! Have you seen the movie? What are your thoughts on it?
D: "I have seen them all! But, I like the movie even though Hulk couldn't come out to plat, he's my favorite. Despite all contract agreements they didn't have to punk him out like that. Lol. I'm thinking they went to the soul stone and Doctor Strange saw this as the only way."
Q: Aside from crafting, tell me what other geeky things you enjoy?
D: "I like reading, watching cartoons... Assassination Classroom is my all time fav, I wish I could go Mach speed. I like Dragonball Z and Naruto Goku and Naruto remind me of each other. I also enjoy yard work and crystals."
Q: Do you have any other future Wire Art projects that you want to tell us about?
D: "As I stated before, I am moving away from jewelry arts and working towards paintings and designs. These paintings include wire and beats to create sensory art. I came up with this concept because of my daughter. She loves to create and she loves to touch and discuss different textures."
And there you have it, my interview with Dot from Healing Evergreen. I know she's moving away from jewelry and the Avengers Infinity Stone ring isn't currently listed on her Etsy shop. But if you just got to have your hands on it (like me) hit her up and I'm sure you both can work something out. Tell her The Hulk sent you 😉
I have a confession, I may be stuck in 2005. Yes back when iPods were a lot bigger, Rhapsody was still a thing, and I spent hours on end listening to a song I didn't know by a band I didn't know on repeat.
That band was Fall Out Boy.
Fast forward to the present and that obsession only grew over time. What still keeps me a Fall Out Boy stan in 2K18?
That's right, ladies and gentleman, the lyrics.
I'm a word nerd, which you probably know by now, since I do the writing thing. But something about someone who can just...word *heart eyes*
Some lyrics just stick with you forever. Let's look at some of the Fall Out Boy lyrics that actually helped me get through some rough times.
"You are what you love, not who loves you"
This lyric was majorly important in a time where I made a decision to distance myself from toxic people for my own mental health. However, toxic people rarely see it this way and use many manipulation tactics to make you feel unlovable. This lyric was my mantra for a good year.
"Put on Your War Paint"
Another long used mantra of mine. When I was nervous or about to walk into a stressful situation, I could just say, "Quinzel, it's time to put on your war paint" and I was ready to go.
"I Don't Just Want To Be A Footnote in Someone Else's Happiness"
While the song is mainly about an extramarital affair, being a footnote in someone else's happiness can apply to many different situations. This lyric was a wake-up call for me and helped me nope out of a lot of one-sided relationships.
"Before It Gets Better The Darkness Gets Bigger The Person That You'd Take A Bullet For Is Behind The Trigger"
As painful as this lyric is, there's something refreshing when your feelings are put into words. When dealing with betrayal of any kind, it can be hard to access your feelings besides hurt and anger. This lyric made me feel less alone.
"May The Bridges That I Burn Light The Way Back Home"
Mmm, yes. Toxic people I have walked away from took it as my Walk of Shame. Quinzel will be back. Quinzel can't survive on her own. She doesn't wanna burn her bridges with us.
Well, guess what, bitches? I got matches.
"I'm A Stitch Away From Making It And And A Scar Away From Falling Apart"
At times I feel simultaneously ok and not ok. I feel like I'm so close to the finish line but I cannot take on another boss fight I'm tired and determined. I'm discouraged but riding on faith all at the same time.
And I can feel not ok and everything still feel ok. Ya know?
So there you have it. Been loving Fall Out Boy for over a decade and quite loving the heck out of the lyrics. Are there any Fall Out Boy lyrics that I didn't list here that healed you? What other lyrics from other bands have healed you? Sound off and leave us a comment
Disclaimer: on my search for nerdy products to make my hectic mom life a little easier, the ladies at Espionage Cosmetics were kind enough to send me their nail wraps to try in exchange for an honest review. They didn't pay me and all of the following is my truth.
This ain't yo' regular stick on nails!
For geeky girls like us, we want to have more than solid colors and chevron patterns? No No one else will have something like Sonic The Hedgehog nail wraps any time soon. We are the oddballs of the earth, and we wear it proud! And Espionage Cosmetics helps you to wear that oddball geekery right on your nails.
That being said, I am a mom, a new mom at that. I bite my nails, I wash bottles constantly, and...let's not get started on diaper changes. But my baby, Bby-8, is still the coolest. Even if I have to sacrifice my geeky fashion.
Yeah, I ain't seen a nail polish bottle in...I'm not sure, sometime last year? Thing is, you can probably get a few strokes of polish on your nails as a new mom, but being ready at a moments notice with a tiny baby meant that drying time was a thing of the past.
But I STILL want to look nice sometimes and just dress a little more...me. I freely admit I am not an adult. Age wise, yes, I am in my 30s. But I am also showing up in Pac Man leggings and band tees. I like bright colors and I make soccer moms roll their eyes.
So, I stumbled upon Espionage Cosmetics at the beginning of my pregnancy. And, yeah, I was sold then. But shortly after clicking on it, that good ol' morning sickness kicked in and it was a distant memory.
But I have been given a second chance to try out these nails for myself and I am going to share with you my findings? Are the designs super cool? Are they easy to put on? How much can they withstand? Are the ladies of Espionage Cosmetics super cool?* Keep reading on for my review.
"Ok Quinzel, How Do They Look Tho?"
The designs are awesome. They have something for every kind of geek. From gamers to book nerds and even fans of grilled cheese, there's something for every kind of geeky girl. If I had unlimited funds, I'd most definitely get one of each (yes, even the grilled cheese one).
LISTEN, don't be silly like me and forget to peel the clear backing off the front. It makes a HUGE difference in the nerdy nail wraps looking more like polish instead of like a sticker.
"I Am Also A Geeky Mom and I Ain't Got That Much Time To Be Doing Nails"
Girl me neither! Again I was lucky if I could get one nail painted before I had to attend to Bby-8. Thing is, these wraps are quick, easy, and you don't even have to apply heat to them! I do recommend using a top coat to get a little more last out of it, but again, if time is a factor, you'll be ok without it.
"Does It At Least Outlast A Few Sleepless Nights? What Day Is it?"
I have....no idea what day it is, so I am going to deflect by telling you about how long it lasts. On the packaging, it says it can last up to two weeks. And since my maintenance has sorta plummeted, I can deal with not having to think about my nails for two weeks.
The thing is, as a Geeky Mom, I spend a lot of time washing bottles, and I mean, water and adhesives just don't mix. So as amazing as they are, at this stage in my life, they only make it about a week. On the plus side, I can't even get nail polish to last over 24 hours so...I mean that ain't so bad
So...Should I Do The Thing?
If "the thing" is buy them, then yes, absolutely. Open a new tab. Do it now! And I wouldn't endorse a product I wouldn't buy myself so let's wait for this paycheck to drop and see what happens.
Luckily, as a fellow Geeky Mom, I realize diapers take up most of your expenses, so hop on over to Espionage Cosmetics and use GEEKYGIRL10 to get 10% off.
If you want to learn more about Espionage Cosmetics, check out their Facebook page. Got any questions about their products and want to hear more from someone who has used them? Shoot me an email and I'll give you the scoop!
*= I mean, I'm not reviewing humans because that would be...idk? But I can assure you, you would want to be BFFs with these ladies in real life.
Disclaimer: I reached out to the ladies of Oma Goodies to see if they would let me try their product in exchange for my honest review. I wasn't paid for this, so, uh, yeah. Honesty and whatnot.
The people want to know, "what's the point of you reviewing geeky baby stuff for geeky mommies?"
Well, I will give you two scenarios.
- Maybe you're a first-time Geeky Mom. You can't wait to show off your Death Star shaped belly and plan to use your maternity leave browsing cute baby stuff on Etsy. The reality is: you'll be too full of love, overwhelmed, sleep deprived, and maybe a little smelly (cause let's face it, showers are a world-class luxury those first few months) to even have the energy to open a browser. So wouldn't it be nice if your old pal Quinzel tested it out for you? That could buy you a precious 30 minutes of sleep.
- Or let's say you don't have kids. And you want to buy things for your friends that are as useful as they are adorable. Unfortunately, sometimes you just get one or the other. And how the heck would you know for sure when you don't have any babies to test it on?
One look through Omas Goodies Etsy shop and you will be wishing for septuplets, cause you will want to dress all of your offspring in their adorable geeky baby wear.
The pattern I got was Minions and it was awfully cute. The stitching on all of the items was very professionally done. The opposite side of the fabric was absorbent and soft.
So if you're looking for cute fandom stuff. You're in the right place. But, like how we question all cute things, is it useful?
Because here's the thing, your baby is going to spit up A LOT. Then they are going to drool A LOT MORE. So you would get lucky if your cutesy nerdy baby stuff lasted through one photo. Again, not the case with Oma's Goodies. This stuff is useful annnndd cute 🙂
The burp cloth is the perfect size while the bib is a little small triangle shape. At first, I was a bit worried about that, but as it turns out, it was perfect.
The material on the back of the burp cloth and bib remind me of those ShamWow commercials because I'm telling you, it gets up everything. There was a pretty epic spit up that somehow missed the bib completely and ended up on the floor. I was able to soak it all up just using the bib!
Lastly, this tie is just darn cute. It ended up in Bby-8's mouth several times, so I'm just going to take that as he loves it too.
So if you're a mom or buying a gift for a mom, Omas Goodies is the way to go. Not only is it cute and useful, their prices are really affordable. I am probably going to return myself and get the Star Wars set.
TW: this article discusses sexual assault and rape that happens in 13 Reasons Why, season 2. And while I am about to rip a rapist to shreds, I am sensitive to you protecting your mental health. Proceed with caution. Also, if you or someone you know is a rape victim, here is a list of resources that may be able to provide support. Take care of yourselves, we care about you 🙂
I hear ya, this season of 13 reasons Why isn't without issues, and that's putting it lightly. After that overly gratuitous and unnecessary rape scene, I have more than 13 reasons to throw this series in the trash.
Let's dig it out of the trash for a second. Wash off the sticky goo and banana peels and focus on the one thing these writers did right.
They told us why Bryce was able to easily able to commit such heinous acts against women.
It was NOT because he:
- Was abused as a child
- Was raped himself
- Was tired of being rejected by women
- Was acting out any form of trauma and, therefore, was able to get sympathy from viewers
Bryce was an asshole rapist simply because he was an asshole rapist.
He had no excuse. He was a privileged, athletic white boy who got anything he wanted. Even in his speech to his mother, he shrugs while admitting "I wanted her, so I f*cked her"
This is in regards to his rape of Hannah Baker.
Often times in media, we are made to sympathize with a person who has no regard for their victims' feelings. We are made to feel sorry and to try to understand their side of the story. It's frustrating to watch and it's just another way of making their victims (and any victims watching) feel powerless.
But not this time. We went into this whole trial knowing that Hannah, Jessica, and even Bryce's girlfriend Chole, were all, without question, raped by this fucking rich asshole. And it's very clear that this asshole was not sorry.
While it's disheartening to see the jury ultimately believe his fake ass nerd defense, maybe this will cause viewers of the show to think before they dismiss a victims statement.
Your rapist can be rich, can be smart, can have anyone they want, can even have a partner that they have consensual sex with, and STILL be a rapist.
I really hope that this begins to change others perception of "The Perfect Victim" and stop making excuses for people who believe that they are entitled to other peoples bodies.
What do you think about 13 reasons why season 2? Leave us a comment and start a discussion
"Didn't I Say To Sit Down Somewhere" Update: AMBIEN GIRL??? FOR REALL?? ok, this shit deserves its own post. Coming soon...
Update to the update: Welp, apparently ABC canceled the show so...um...yeah. Good timing in this article, I guess?
Update: On May 29th, we received further evidence to Roseanne Barr's "ain't shitness" when she tweeted "muslim brotherhood and planet of the apes had a baby=VJ". VJ being in reference to Valerie Jarrett, Barack Obama's former advisor. Shout out to Roseanne for proving my below points to be correct. Now take several seats and quit pretending this racist bullshit is funny.
Ok, the Roseanne reboot needs a timeout. Even if I have to drag it to the corner kicking and screaming, I've got to just stick to my guns and remain firm. Do not come out until you have learned your lesson.
The previous episode told me everything I need to know. Roseanne's mom does the whole "I'm going to pretend to kill myself to manipulate you into doing what I want" thing (which, if you have ever grown up with a toxic mother that manipulated you in this way, fair warning, it's cringe-worthy to watch). Dan is doing everything he can to ensure that Darlene's son will need therapy in his push to make him more masculine. Seriously Dan? That birdhouse had some amazing craftsmanship in it. Who cares if it's "feminine" (birdhouses don't have vaginas but whatever let's just gender everything) let the boy live!
So, in episode 7, it starts off with Roseanne spying on her Muslim neighbors through some holes in a rake. Obvious spying aside, I'm gonna just go ahead and tell you everything that's wrong with this episode.
"Aww, Roseanne, your Islamophobia is so cute"
**Spoiler alert, it's not**
There were many times when Roseanne's racist comments were followed by a laugh track. On top of that, the writer's decided to add a side story of Dan being pissed off about a guy hiring "illegals" to do cheaper work.
I'm not gonna argue with you whether I believe that this line of thinking is in line with original Roseanne's thinking. Personally, I always thought as much as they looked the stereotypical blue-collar family, they knew what it was like to be different and didn't pull racist bullshit like that. But that's an argument for another day (I'm just gonna drop a little proof really quick cause I'm a bit of an asshole like that).
What I am going to say, regardless if you feel like this behavior is authentic to the character or not, it is so many levels of "not ok" to make it look cute or funny.
They didn't even truly address her behavior as being wrong or gave her any consequences about it, but I'll get into that later
It shows us why "I'm not racist, I have a black friend/family member/co-worker" does not work
You mean to tell me you got a whole black granddaughter that lives with you and you can't see why assuming your neighbors are terrorists is more than a little messed up? What if you called the police on them? What if that was YOUR granddaughter sleeping in a bulletproof vest every night? But, no, "that's different" Give me a break
The Brown People Know What They're Talking About, But Their Story Gets Overlooked
There was a Skype call to Mary's mom, who is a soldier in Iraq. Roseanne tells her about the neighbors and asks her how can she tell the difference between the good guys and the bad guys. She laughs and tells Roseanne that she has more reason to be afraid of walking around Lanford.
Shit, straight up truth. When black folks are out here getting murdered for something as simple as knocking on a door asking for directions, it's scary as hell out here. But of course, this line goes straight over Roseanne's head
When Roseanne learns her neighbors are from Yemen, she says "oh that country's not even on the travel ban list" to which the Muslim wife answers "Yes, it is"
again, while this line points out Roseanne's ignorance, it's still put off as cute, as if her behavior towards these neighbors don't have the ability to result in some serious consequences. Falsely accusing a Muslim of being a terrorist, especially a family with a small child, is just not ok. There are subtle hints from the family that touches on this, and as a person of color, I picked up on it. But still, I feel like the seriousness of the situation was played off as a joke.
Here Comes Roseanne to Save The Day, Except Not Really
One of the last scenes takes place in a grocery store, where some asshole who works there decides to make snide comments and asking Roseanne to "carry her groceries to her camel"
It's a sucky, mild occurrence that Roseanne felt safe enough to say something. She tells off the girl, Roseanne style, that she was rude and was gonna bring it up to her manager. She does bring up, in the end, that their family has enough fertilizer to blow up the place. While funny, it doesn't...really tell the girl that her assumptions were wrong.
So, at this point, we are supposed to stand and cheer for Roseanne for standing up to that cashier and to that, I say, nah girl, you really didn't do anything.
After this woman leaves the grocery store, her and her family are gonna face even more bullshit from the residents from Lanford. Roseanne, her son is terrified to sleep! That means that the racism they face is way more intense than just a pissy little grocery clerk’s comments.
So, congratulations, you did nothing. You must be so proud.
So, Quinzel, what can we do better?
Like I said in the beginning, Roseanne needs a timeout. There needs to be some reflection on if some of her quirks that are shown as "cute" or "funny" are justifying to others that feel the same way that their racist thoughts and actions are also cute and funny. There is no call to action at the end. No "hey, by the way, if you see someone Islamic being harassed, here's what you can do" at the end. Nothing. There is not enough evidence that the writers, ABC, and Roseanne Barr herself, find this behavior appalling.
Tell me your thoughts on the Roseanne reboot. What did you think about this episode in particular? Leave us a comment and keep the conversation going!
You're probably thinking one of three things:
- "Whatever, I'm in"
- "What in the fresh Hell?"
- "I already know how to draw black people. Source: Am Black"
Cool, cool. So let me break down why you should back this Kickstarter by tearing down all of your excuses.
"Whatever, I'm in"
Great! Wow, that didn't take much convincing. Go to this link and donate. We really want Malikali's goal to be reached by May 31st. Dang, you rock. You get a sticker (seriously, prove to us that you backed it before May 31st and we will send you a free podcast sticker).
"What in the fresh Hell?"
Well, that's an interesting way to say, "Tell me more, Quinzel" So I'll do it.
Listen, Black Panther is taking off and Black and Brown folks are about to be all over your TV. screens. As an artist, you may want to include PoC in your art and if you are conscious about how your characters are portrayed, you want to draw them accurately. Enter, "How to Draw Black People"
Malikali Shabazz is an artist based out of Los Angeles, California that penned the idea of “How to Draw Black People" "The unwritten idea, but tangible logic, that "if you can draw a white person you can draw anyone" just won't cut it anymore." Shabazz says in his Kickstarter bio. And he's right. If you want to have diverse characters, you need to understand their features. And there are some features that are common to each race.
I hear you in the back, guy in the back screaming "We are all the same." Yes deary, so tell me, can I walk into Fantastic Sams and get a retwist done on my dreadlocks? No, didn't think so*.
"Audiences are asking for diversity and authentic characters based on real cultures. The teachings we have now are woefully out of date and never touch on ways to depict more than what lies on the surface." Malikali says.
This isn't your normal "How To" book. It teaches facial features, hairstyles, and so much more. If you're an artist, you need this for your art studyin'.
"I already know how to draw black people. Source: Am Black"
Ok, and while that is a very credible source, I'm gonna still need you to back this Kickstarter. It can still help you if you are an artist. For example, I'm a black female with dreads; I live with this day in and day out. I know every curl, every turn, and every grey hair that I just slip back in there. But if someone asked me to draw someone with a fade, well, I'd be kinda screwed.
And even if you know the ins and outs of every black feature and hairstyle (maybe you're a cosmetologist? I don't know) it's still great to support one of your own who is trying to put out a very important and beneficial piece of work.
So, now that you're out of excuses, get on over to back this Kickstarter toot sweet! We only have until May 31st!
*I s2g if you tell me Fantastic Sams twists dreadlocks I will literally fight your lying ass