I really need you to stop ruining my media
Oh god. Where to begin.
When Harry Potter became a phenomenon, I was a bit too old for the initial hype. I was a sophmore in college. The only reason I came to read it was that I was dumping trash in the trash can and I spied a brand new book before I dumped my trash. It was the first book of the Harry Potter series. I picked it up before I dumped my trash and proceeded to read. I was hooked.
What followed after that was daydreaming about what house I would be in (I now know it is Ravenclaw), and doing midnight book buys with my friends.
J.K Rowling is ruining all of that for us now.
In case you didn't know what happened, J.K is doubling down on her TERF-yness by all kinds of tweets.
To fully understand the problem with this, you have to be a little nuanced. Just a little bit though. You see, all menstruating people are not women. That's the nuance. That is it, right there. That's all you got to do. J.K then doubled down, and used "My black friend said it was okay." Only, with a lesbian.
My husband (and many other people, I am aware he did not coin it) have a saying. "You die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become a villain" In our social media times, you have to die pretty quickly not to become the villain.
This other one isn't a surprise. Stephanie Meyer has always been trash. The only black person in the whole Twilight franchise is an bad guy, who is super ashy (like... he needed some shea butter badly) and didn't have time to get his locs retwisted before being changed. I am not talking about her though. I am talking about the Twilight Fan-fiction groups.
If you listen to our podcast, then you know, the only fan fiction I read is Twilight. Whenever there is a disaster, they band together, writing fiction and raising funds. I tend to struggle with this group of women, because in the entire history of me reading the fan fiction, I have come across a Black Bella, once. And she was biracial. The story was never finished and Bella talked about bbq sauce a lot in the story.
I haven't heard a Black Lives Matter. I haven't heard a rallying call. I haven't even heard support of anything, and quite frankly, I am tired. I am tired of having to bring it up. Being an ally, being a true ally is stepping forward, and none of these women seem to do that. I do remember at some point someone bringing up the fact that no one seems to write POCs in their stories, except for when Zafrina, or the Quileute Tribe (which, they got the severe short end of the stick on this story as well) comes in. And everyone was like "They don't exist in the story." Every single story has characters that aren't in the story, but you still write about their slim milky throats just fine.
Guys I am tired. I AM TIRED and I know Quinzel is too. Can we just have a brief stop on shitty behavior and tired excuses for the rest of 2020? I need a break.
Rona Blahness Part 2
With the Black lives being taken with no regard and the Rona, I have needed a ton of fantasy to delve into. Today I am listening to Hello From the Magic Tavern.
Do you have a podcast you thoroughly enjoy? Let me know in the comments.
Curing The Rona Blahness
One of the things that I find myself doing during all of this #cornteen is writing postcards to my friends. I love getting mail that isn't bills. A friend of mine and I started exchanging postcards infrequently a couple years ago. I'll send a few throughout the year, and every time I go on vacation I make sure to send her one from each area I am at that allows me to. I have roped Quinzel on this as well and send her postcards from all over.
A long time ago I belonged to a website called InterPals. I decided to see if I was still a member and I am! I found someone to write to and will be sending her letters soon. I had penpals all throughout high school. Normally they were in France as I was taking French. I enjoy writing letters. I also enjoy collecting stationary. This is a way to get a use out of the stationery. I recently bought some stationery on etsy and if follow us on Instagram, you would have saw me mention it in the instastories.
This is just one of the many things I do to try and keep a positive outlook. What about you? What are you doing to try and curb your blahness?
New Year, Same Me
Greetings and salutations! I hope everyone’s holiday and subsequent return back to work was happy, healthy, and productive.
Over the past couple of months I have been sitting here racking my brain about the form and function I would like the blog and podcast to take. With the podcast, I tend to neglect the blog, leaving a lot of the day to day content to Quinzel. I started blogging as a way for me to have a creative writing outlet from my job. Because baybee, let me tell you, I am in the wrong job.
As I get older I am realizing more and more the fact that I have no creative outlet in my job is straight stifling me. Add to the fact I am not a huge fan of taking orders, you can see that I am not doing super great in corporate America.
Here are my goals. I would like the podcast and the blog to create income. Maybe not a lot of income at first, just enough to pay for the hosting of both. That would be awesome, because the blog hosting I pay triannually and it hurts. I’d like to do both of these full time. That would make me happiest. In order to start generating profit I need to start putting out content regularly. My goal is to sit down this weekend and see what is feasible for me. Something I do need is a consistent schedule. My hope is with a consistent schedule I can create more. I need to use the opportunities to write and reecord that I have. For example I am writing this while Geeky Baby is in her dance class. That is about 45+ minutes (minus shoe changes) of time a week I can use to write, plan, send email requests, etc. I need to start being mindful with my time which is truly a struggle for me. I literally will spend hours scrolling Facebook and retweeting on Twitter. I want to reach out to creatives and learn their stories and present their stories to you. This means I need to actually nut up and speak to people. I want to get better at interviewing. I want to do more. So I shall.
I hope you are ready to see more of me in 2020. I missed you .
NSFW REVIEW: Geekin’ Out With Geeky Sex Toys
CW: NSFW content including talks of masturbation and female anatomy. I also say the f-word because, well, I felt it was f#cking appropriate considering the subject manner
Geeky Sex Toys was kind enough to send me the toy in exchange for an honest review. In short, they were like, "masturbate with our product and talk about it openly and honestly." You can see why I couldn't turn that down.
I'm going to be straightforward for a second.
Sex is healthy. Masturbation is healthy. Neither is gross or shameful.
Now that you are fully aware of my thoughts beforehand, you'll understand how un-shy (new word, I'm calling it) I am when it comes to sex toys.
But g e e k y sex toys?? You have my complete attention.
One look around the Geeky Sex Toys site and it will have you geeking out from head to...yeah, that too. Emma and Josh, founders of Geeky Sex Toys are in Brisbane, Austraila. They create, design, and make all of their toys BY HAND.
This duo of sex toy makers are no strangers to fandoms either. With a clever use of puns, they've got lines such as Doctor Screw (Doctor Who) DickPool (Deadpool) Orgasms of the Galaxy (Guardians of the Galaxy) and The Indulgers (The Avengers)
In that first Facebook post, I showed you guys a censored version of what I got. Well, now you're gonna see it.
Ladies and Gents, I give you, the Dildek
The Dildek is, obviously, from the Doctor Screw collection. Modeled after the famous Daleks, I promise you it won't kill you. This one comes in two colors: black and gold. And it comes in 2 sizes: large and small. The one I received and pictured above is a small
Foreplay and First Impressions
Upon opening the box, I was quite impressed. Their handiwork is pretty amazing honestly!
You know how you might see a toy at a bachelorette party that seems really cool, but actually seeing it you realize its just plastic crap? With something as cool as Doctor Who, I expected it might be lacking in quality and using the fandom to make up for it
I was proven wrong right on the spot.
So now that I know that it LOOKS good, my next thought is to see how long it would stay that way. I felt like it was time to put this thing through a series of non-masturbation tests. These tests were mainly me throwing it as far as I could across the room, shaking it as hard as I could, and smacking it upside a couple different surfaces in my home.
The most awesome thing I discovered while playing around with the durability of this toy is that the bottom is actually a suction so that you can ride it, no partner needed. I tested this by slapping it on my kitchen floor and kicking it a little with my foot to see if it would stay. It did.
I also noticed with all this shaking and throwing that it did not create any tears in the silicone. Damn, this amazing grade of silicone! Damn, this amazing craftmanship! It's really hanging in there!
Now that I have hazed the shit out of it, it's time to get down to business.
Fuck and Fuckability by Quinzel Austen
(Sorry, Jane Austen)
After being quite impressed with how well it handled several stress tests (ok, I was mainly having fun) I needed to know about the Dildek's level of fuckability because...well, that's the whole reason I bought it, right?
As I stated earlier in the review the Dildek comes in two sizes, large and small. While there's no shame in having dildos that are Hulk-sized, I was a bit intimidated by a large, so I requested a small.
Now, small does not mean slim. When I saw the size of this toy, I was *still* intimidated. Like all of that needs to go in...all of me? So if you are into slimmer sex toys, lube up.
Also, if you have small hands like me, you may benefit from a small instead of a large. It was only a slight challenge to hold on to. The bumpy texture definitely assists with having a good grip, even with lube applied. However, closer to the end is a wider base, so a little difficult to get a real good grip in. But, as an alternative, there is an option to use the base on a flat surface and ride, hands-free.
Size aside, this silicone feels great. I'd say it's skin-like, but I don't know if I've ever felt skin this good. It's perfectly smooth enough to move outside and inside of a vagina that makes you kind of forget that you're masturbating with a fandom toy
Another nice thing about the Dildek is the bumpy textures. If you can get it just right, it makes great for clitoral stimulation. For me, it was easier to achieve by hand than by riding, since the bumps are closer to the bottom of the base.
The biggest challenge with the Dildek? Trying to stop making Doctor Who references during sex, but maybe you do this anyway *guilty*
Would I Recommend?
The quality of this toy is beyond impressive. It's durable, flexible, and downright cute.
I will level with you and tell you that Geeky Sex Toys will cost you a pretty penny, but they are so worth the money.
10/10 would recommend you save up your coin and buy from them
10/10 would cum again 😉
Have any of you bought anything from Geeky Sex Toys? What did you think? Does this review make you want to buy from them? Have any questions for me? Drop a comment below and I'll answer!
Geeky Girl Self Care: Love Yourself by…Loving Yourself (Yes I’m Talking About Masturbation)
Editor here: This isn't a kiddie entry, so you may want to get prying eyes away from the screen. Also, we were not sponsored for this review, nor were we given any sex toys. Though none of us would turn them down amirite?!
Here's the thing. We all know self care is important. And I'll be frank, you always know the best way to get yourself off. So have no shame in lighting some candles, turning on some music, and making yourself feel good.
Now, for some of us Geeky Girls, the world of sex toys can be overwhelming, and a little racist at that. Not gonna lie, its kinda weird to see the Fat Chocolate Cock dildo with Realistic Black Balls and not feel a little odd about it.
So, whats a geeky girl to do to get her groove on. Luckily, I stole my internet browser's innocence so you didnt have to.
I came across Geeky Sex Toys and honestly, I just thought it was one of those products that were available for cheesy puns and giggles, but actually the materials used to create the toys are of the highest quality.
They have toys for all kinks and all fandoms. Actually the latest line is based on the Avenger: Infinity War movie. There's toys for anal play, strapping on, and yes, an Incredible Hulk dildo that is just as girthy as it is punny.
So yeah, for some good old fashioned self care, take care of yourself and head over to Geeky Sex Toys.
Did you see anything that you want to buy? What do you think of their products? Leave us a comment and tell us if you notice the Iron Man butt plug lights up (yes, girl, yes).
Entering From Stage Left, Guest Writer Quinzel Lee Takes The Stage
Leslie here. I would like to introduce you to my buddy Quinzel Lee. She is here to fill your life with nerdy weirdness. I love her. You should too. Take it away Quinzel!
Hi there, I’m Quinzel Lee, ready to rock your mix-matched socks off with some geekery. I also enjoy romantic dinners and long walks to the bank.
The ladies of Geeky Girls Guide to Life have allowed me to drop in from time to time as a guest writer. They felt it was best that I warn you about what you’re getting into.
A little about me, I currently write for DontHateTheGeek.Com with geeky news, reviews, and op eds. However, if you want me to be a little more…me…stay tuned for my guest articles here. You can also catch me on the Twitter-verse @quinzelee . Give me a shout, a hashtag, or even just a hashbrown from McDonalds, I'm not picky
What kind of music do I like? All. Yes, my answer is all. Yes, including country. Yes, also including rap. Do you need a definition of all?
My current obsessions include Jessica Jones, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, The Read podcast, and analyzing every bit of pop culture. I love coming across weird statistics like how many pounds of catfish do people in America consume daily on average (seriously, I want to know). I listen to Sword and Scale podcast, which I DO NOT recommend if you sleep alone. And my Snuggie is prepped and ready for a Hulu or Netflix marathon at any moment.
Did you follow all that? See why I needed to warn you? So look out for content from me, Quinzel Lee. I can guarantee that it will be a wang dang doodle of a good time.
Year in Review
2017. What can you say about it? In 2016 we saw the death of huge icons, of people we have admired for years. 2017 continued the theme of death. Not of people per se, but of ideals. People that we thought were kind, courageous, and brave ended up being total trash heaps. Our country is in the middle of one of the biggest dumpster fires I have ever seen. That is what 2017 meant to me.
2018 is here and it is full of the optimism, hope, and joy we once wished 2017 would hold for us. Please let that be true. I am not sure I can handle too many more dumpster fires.
It is a new year. It is the same old me. I don’t believe in resolutions. I never keep them. I am however working on being a better person. Here is the list of things I plan on doing for the new year (But I had also been working on them in 2017 as well)
1) Organization
If 2017 was a dumpster fire, my brain is part of the trash heap that had lighter fluid sprayed liberally upon it. I am an organizational nightmare. I worked on this a lot by obtaining a paper planner and started to use that. I did not use it as well as I could have and that is what I want to work on this year. I actually have two planners this year. One for my job, and one for my personal life. Maybe if I organize a little bit better I could have the time and energy to do the things I want to do when I have down time. It might make it easier for me to craft more or organize more activities for geeky baby. To see some of the fun creative stuff I have been doing with my planner, don’t forget to check us out on Instagram.
2) Werqin on my fitness
2017 saw me change my eating habits a lot. I eat (most of the time) like I have some damn sense. I drink more water than I do diet soda. Though I do still enjoy an icy cold Diet Cherry Dr. Pepper. I make somewhat of an attempt to bring a healthy lunch and snacks to work that work well with a diabetic.
I am the most sedentary person you will ever meet in your life. Like I am a total slug. It amazes my husband that he can find me in one spot and 5 hours later I will be in that same spot huddled up with a blanket on doing absolutely nothing. He doesn’t understand it at all. I feel like if I exercised more, maybe I would get some energy back? Isn’t that how it is supposed to work? We shall see. I found some free videos on YouTube and will be using those to start. If I feel like it is something I could go gung ho on, I may get a gym membership.
3) Do Your Homework!
I have been talking about this one or a while. My goal this year is to do every single bit of homework Nerdette assigns throughout the year. You may be asking yourself “Why in the hell would she want to do homework?” In addition to being a nerd, I am an absolute geek. I live for homework. Plus, I have done several of the homework assignments from Nerdette, and I always come away with some knowledge, or at least a good book recommendation.
So yes. These are the major things I have in store for 2018. Do you have anything that you want to grow or develop? Did you have a great 2017? Let us know!
Espionage Cosmetics
